"Just when I thought you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!" -Dumb and Dumber

 Lian and I went to Dubliners, an Irish pub, to get some drinks before going to a club. We met up with a ton of USD kids there. On the metro on our way there we sat across from a group of spanish guys who were all scrawny and tatted up and seemed to be our age. Then one of 'em just casually pulls out a blunt, lights up, passes it around and then asks Lian if she wanted any. But in the wise words of orientation "just because you see people smoking in public it doesn't mean its legal," so she politely declined.  After that we knew it would be a good night.
When we got to Dubliners we sat down with the USD people already there and started drinking. And drinking. And drinking. I decided to document every drink Chris had last night, but ended up only documenting the first couple because he would run off and take a shot without telling me, like an asshole.

    2 euro coronas, fiesta! 

                                                           

tequila shot numero uno

 drink #3: a sex appeal

 tequila shot numero dos

   the gave us lemons. . strange

                                                             
Missing from documentation: drinks 6-12. . or 13. . . or 14. . . . or 15, it's unclear

Lian and I made some new friends at the bar including a couple Irish guys and two Spanish guys, and a group of absolutely blacked out Americans who were hilarious. But of course us USDians were the life of the party.

 Jagerbombs, jagerbombs, fuckin jagerbombs

 After Dubliners we went to another bar, La fontana de Oro, because almost all of the clubs were closed. But everyone was dancing at this bar and like, all we wanted to do was like dance, you know? So there were more drinks drank and shots shot and dances danced. Of course, all of those drinks were completely unnecessary by this time of the night, we were schwasted. And then it was time to go home. We hopped in a cab and told him our street name, although we had no idea what number our house was.   15 euros later we hopped out at a little kid's park that we recognized and THOUGHT was the one we walk past to get to the metro from the house. And then we swang? swung? went swinging? were on the swing set? and talked about life. . . for an hour. Of course, while swinging I managed to slam my foot into the ground and gash my toe. typical.
We went to leave we realized that it was, in fact, a different park and we had no idea where we were. But I had my iphone so it was all good. But then it died. (You see where this going don't you?) It was 6 am at this point and pitch black and absolutely deserted everywhere. So we start walking in the direction we think the house is. And walking. And walking. And walking.
We walked for an hour and a half. In the dark. In alleys.  Exactly what should not be done. We were pretty sure we would be those dumb American girls who got taken their first night in Madrid. We may have broken into a run a couple of times because of the creepy level. Finally we started running into some people, all of whom were on their way to work, and got directions. Turns out we're just ruhtards. Very inebriated ruhtards.

The red is more or less the way we went (going toward the top of the map), we weaved in out of more little streets than the map can show. The blue is how we should have gone. 

By the time we were on our final stretch home it was 7:30. And getting light out. Then we couldn't get our door open. Luckily Hannah and Breanne heard us and let us in. 

And that is the story of my first night out in Madrid. It's going to be one hell of a trip.